Thursday, September 23, 2010

Stage Two

We are thrilled to be moving forward in the adoption process. We originally completed and notarized our application in early May, but didn’t have the first $8,790 to move forward. But, with the generosity of our friends and family, we now have enough to move forward. Our target is Oct 15th to reapply and move into the second stage.

The next step is exciting and terrifying! Over the next six months we will be completing over 100 pages of paperwork, learning in education classes, meeting with our case manager at home study visits, and much more. The paperwork is time sensitive so we have six months to complete everything and raise another $5,600.
To be frank. Chris and I have been saving between $400 and $500 a month toward the adoption. At this rate we will only have half of the $5,600 needed in six months. We are short another $2,000 - $3,000.

If you are anything like me, you make every decision being fully prepared. Responsibility right? Absolutely, we are doing our best to be wise with the resource God has loaned to us, educated about the financial decisions, and generous towards the needs in our church, community, and world. I believe this wholeheartedly.

It is tough to live life with an open hand, right? The world says we earned our title, salary, power, and social status and deserve to have “it.” So, why tithe to the church? Why support a child clear across the world? Why donate at a local hospital or school? Why share resources and supplies with neighbors? We could certainly ask these question all day long and discuss all the scenarios of why supporting, donating, and sharing is so difficult.

But the answer is simple … “It” was not ours to begin with.

“It” never was and never will be. Everything is a gift from God. We have the choice to use “it” for His glory or to hide “it” away for ourselves. “It” (the very thing you think you need) is perhaps, the biggest distraction from God himself. Do you know your “it”? I certainly know mine. Control.

Control over my time, energy, money, friendship, marriage, education, ect. I could go on and one. But, very few things speak louder than money. Look at your own checkbook if you do not believe me? When is the last time you have joyfully given to support God’s work? Plain and simple, money is a huge indicator of our spiritual maturity.

You are probably wondering what my point is. Certainly not to make anyone feel bad. Perhaps, all this writing is how I process areas in my own life that are in need of attention. Clearly, I am desperate for God’s grace and forgiveness when it comes to my own illusions of control. Please don’t mistake my words. I am not writing this blog from a pedestal with a pointed finger, I am writing this with humility and requesting your help. You see, this adoption process has destroyed my illusion of control. I simply cannot make this adoption process happen or change the undeniable passion He has planted in my heart. I have lost control and cannot do this alone.

Truly, this loss of control is beautiful. I wholeheartedly recommend you celebrate the times when you find yourself here.

I have been required to surrender this adoption to God and confidently trust that He knows and cares for all our needs. After all, the same principal as above applies here. This adoption … this precious child I will call daughter or son, is not mine … but His.

My humble request is this:
1. Pray for the second stage in our adoption.
2. Help me to work on my illusion of control through accountability and encouragement.
3. Consider making a donation to help cover the expenses in our second stage or helping with a fundraiser.

Thank-you.

Held in God's open hands,

Erin